Monday, August 2, 2010

In Which ADA Hijacks My Comments

So.

There I was, minding my own business, trying to pack and trying not to throw any kids out the window, when I decided to check email instead. And that's how I found out that ADA had published such nice - but totally untrue - things in the comment section of my recent post.

Before you evaluate what she wrote, you should know: the lady is crazy. Or, to put it in a way that she herself can understand:




SHE.



IS.




TOTALLY.



Making. That. Stuff. Up.



We know she's prone to strangitude. This is, after all, the woman who wore strappy sandals for a hike at Great Falls. This is the same woman who allowed her husband to join the Cyberbones Toe-Shoe Club, thereby adding minutes to his morning routine - minutes he could be spending saving the planet. I mean, what's next? It's only a matter of time before some blogger spots her on the Mall in DC, after Labor Day, dressed in white (probably taking a picture of a miniature spotted South African tree fly perched atop the Capitol Dome, but that's a whole 'nother story).

Here's what she said that's so crazy: She said my children were angels. My children. Let's all pause to let that sink in, shall we?

(Larry? Pam? Kyle? Do you need me to dial 911 for you? Because I'm pretty sure, after that dinner I forced you to suffer through recently with my "angels," you are reading this description and have collapsed into a heap on the floor, laughing so hard you're gasping for air.)

Although I do have to recount one angelic moment.

As the Fitscraps were leaving, the kids ran ahead to the elevator lobby. I heard screams, so I peeked around the corner to find my three eldest children dragging the baby by her feet out of an elevator. Apparently, she tried to run into an open elevator and the other kids knew this to be unsafe. So, being the angels that they are, they tackled her and dragged her, kicking and screaming, back out of the elevator.

Their motivation was angelic, I suppose, if not their actual actions.

So there's that.

Now you know. ADA makes stuff up.

(Except for the stuff she wrote about me. That's all true. I really am that awesome.)

And now, if you'll excuse me, I have a plane to catch with my four little angels.

Go ahead and debate in the comments section, please. I'll be back soon, from Jordan, where rumor has it there is a Starbucks not far from my new house....

9 comments:

Bfiles said... [Reply]

you two are very entertaining. :)
love the elevator story about your kids, and hope you have a very safe and easy trip.

Camille said... [Reply]

Hahahahahaha. This has been a fabulous thing to follow :)

Sara said... [Reply]

I agree with Bfiles, this has been very entertaining!!!

My son took a few solo trips on the Oakwood elevator, giving his parents (me being pregnant) heart attacks.

Rachel said... [Reply]

Can't comment on the kids but just wanted to say I'm terribly jealous of your starbucks!! That was a serious criteria when we bid last year, and yet we ended up in (another) Starbucks-less country (Ecuador this time). Enjoy it!!

A Daring Adventure said... [Reply]

ROTFL!!!!

Oh my gosh, Donna, you crack me up! What a talented writer you are!

You know what's so funny - you are totally right - that is totally how I write! And I honestly didn't even know I wrote like that until you pointed it out.

Oh my GOSH you are so funny!

I hope everything is okay in Amman. I've been thinking of you guys and worrying about you. I know that has to have been one truly horrible journey.

Shannon said... [Reply]

You and Kolbi are a hoot! Thanks for the giggles.

Connie said... [Reply]

I hope your angels are in ADA mode on the flights! ;D Have a great trip, and I can't wait to meet up with you in Amman sometime. Take care and good luck with your new home :)

Sara said... [Reply]

You made it to the State Blog Roundup. If you don't want to be on it, then please let me know! Follow this link to reach the roundup:

http://wifemommywoman.blogspot.com/2010/08/state-dept-blog-roundup.html

Enjoy!

王李慧萍政勳 said... [Reply]

一時的錯誤不算什麼,錯而不改才是一生中永遠且最大的錯誤..................................................

Please. Write your own stuff.