Monday, April 19, 2010

Too Much

We're in the middle of it now, people. Less than 8 weeks to go, which is a lot of time to stress but not a lot of time to accomplish anything. And then there's the travel orders, which still haven't arrived. So we can't actually do anything: no packout scheduling, no ticketing, no nothing.

Still trying to figure out the dog situation. One minute he's leaping up to bark at a cat, the next he's struggling even to stand. He won't even attempt to climb the stairs: we just moved his doggy bed downstairs instead of trying to entice him up the steps. So who knows what'll happen? We may have a dog when we leave post; then again, maybe not. I keep hoping for a sign from God, but so far He's been pretty quiet up there, near as I can tell.

We also have the little matter of the medevac-that-wasn't. We're trying to work out a few health care matters that have not been resolved at post, which means they need to be taken care of while on home leave. Sure, YOU try to hit three different cities on two different coasts with four kids and one dog and no car and then try to schedule a consult, a surgery, an MRI, etc... Ha! Oh, and if the doctor says you need the surgery, but he doesn't have time to do it in the next 48 hours while you're in his city, then you can't go to post. Well, you can, but they won't medevac you for anything related to the condition. Ever. Fun stuff.

So I woke up last night when one of the kids came sneaking into the room, and I couldn't fall back asleep. I was thinking about things like: "Should I even try to go to work during the auto show? I wonder if there will be space for bicycles at our new house? Will I ever learn Arabic? Didn't somebody ask me if I have any firewood outside my house? But who? When will my kids stop crawling in bed with me at night, and why do they kick me while they sleep? I need to send that recipe for peanut butter cookies to so-and-so. Do I need to buy apples tomorrow? I wonder if my missing boot will turn up when we pack out, or if I should just throw away the other one." And so on and so on: random thoughts nagging well into morning. (Tylenol PM, I believe we have an appointment tonight.)

So. Tomorrow I go for another shopping binge with some friends (weird because I usually hate shopping but I seem to be doing it often these days), and another meal at my favorite Chinese restaurant. But everything I do now is tinged with "last." Will this be my last trip to this restaurant? Oh, I hope not. But maybe. Last trip to the market? Last time at this particular gas station?

The brain starts going into overdrive, thinking about all of the things that can't be controlled, trying to find just one little thing that it can.

And that's how I know it's time to start making lists.

But first: to sleep.


Anonymous said... [Reply]

Oh, dear.

This is what happened with our beloved family dog as she began to age and her health gradually began to fail... she would have good days and bad days.

And I *totally* understand about the being unable to fall asleep/ nagging lists in your head in the middle of the night thing. Hope tonight was/ will be better - I've had good luck with a little pink Benadryl cut in half, which is basically Tylenol PM minus the Tylenol. Yeah, I've been there! :)

Kristen said... [Reply]

Ohhh, I can only imagine the emotions (and the lists) involved with all of your decisions right now. I'll definitely continue sending some prayers your way, especially for a "sign" about the pup!!

And thanks for stopping by my blog last week. It sure is a small world in this FS life. I remember reading on your blog that you all had been in Armenia. We are really excited and I'm sure as we get closer to actually moving there, my questions will begin cropping up. So thanks for being available as a resource!! That truly is invaluable in this life!!

Blessings on your family,

Connie said... [Reply]
This comment has been removed by the author.
Connie said... [Reply]

(oops. try again...)
How about find a nice, temp apt. for the time you're in the US, and park it. Let everyone know where you'll be and when. Recommend nice hotels in the area. :p Ok.. maybe, maybe not, but I don't envy the insane running around! We (sort of) did that this summer. (and recommend Marriott Execustay). We landed in the DC area, made no promises to visit anyone. It turned out that we were able to take flights to the southwest and later to the west coast, as we could fit them in, but the "no promises" meant we didn't have to stress about it. Hope your poor old dog feels much better, and soon, that and the rest of this PCS craziness is not too awfully crazy.

Anonymous said... [Reply]

Well begun is half done.......................................................

Jenn D said... [Reply]

At least I have you to go crazy with right now! Can't imagine this nutty last three years without you in it. Wow, I'm gonna miss you. We'll always have...bien fu xia!

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